Parents sharing custody of their children after divorce is viewed as the best scenario for the long-term adjustment of the child. It has a positive impact on their behavior, education, and mental health. Even when being at odds with each other, as long as both parents agree and prioritize their child’s interests, co-parenting becomes easier. But in most cases, co-parenting is still uncooperative and challenging. This could be because of high-conflict situations that make civilized co-parenting almost impossible.
There are several tips to make it work and the focus is on controlling yourself, the only thing you can control to make the situation peaceful. It seems unattainable, but we can break it down into smaller goals to make it less intimidating. Control what you do by trying your best to approach dealings with your ex-partner strictly about your children and in a business-like manner. Insist on texting for documentation of the interactions since you can use them during mediation or in a court of law. Control what you say, be very mindful of your facial expressions and tone of voice. Your kids can pick up on non-verbal cues and let your child know they are safe in confiding in you. Control what you think about because that’s where your energy goes.
Turn your focus away from unsettling behaviors to recover emotional neutrality. Control who you lean on, you don’t have to bear all the weight alone. Reach out to a family member, a trusted friend, or a professional. Control what you can and let go of what you can’t.